Monday, December 26, 2005

*My short story*

Buat Jar

Fiuh, benar-benar hari yang tidak menyenangkan! Untung semuanya telah berakhir, pikirku sambil mengipas-ngipas di sore yang tidak berangin ini. Hanya satu mata kuliah yang dapat kucerna dengan baik karena malam sebelumnya aku telah mempelajarinya terlebih dahulu. Sementara beberapa mata kuliah lainnya kuikuti dengan tidak siap. Entah karena memang sungguh-sungguh tidak cukup waktu untuk membaca semua bahan yang ada atau memang karena diriku saja yang malas menyiapkan segala sesuatunya dari jauh hari. Tak sabar rasanya untuk menumpahkan kemalangan yang membuat kepalaku pusing ini kepadamu.

Kulangkahkan kakiku terus bersama teman-temanku menyusuri peron stasiun UI, yang masih diwarnai terang sinar matahari sore seakan enggan meredupkan cahayanya, dengan mata yang tak lengah mencari celah-celah bangku kosong yang bisa kami duduki di antara para calon penumpang yang menumpuk ini. Aura yang dikeluarkan stasiun pagi tadi berbeda dengan yang kurasakan di sore ini. Pagi tadi peron stasiun dipenuhi mahasiswa yang baru datang dengan penuh semangat dan harapan untuk melaksanakan aktivitas di pagi hari. Bahkan beberapa ada yang tampak bergegas karena terlambat atau karena ingin segera melesat ke rental komputer untuk menyelesaikan tugas yang belum selesai. Sapaan ramah dan celoteh riang terdengar di mana-mana.

Sedangkan atmosfir yang terpancar saat ini terasa redup, tidak sehidup tadi pagi, seakan-akan bukan saja orang-orang yang ada di stasiun ini tapi juga benda-benda yang berada di sekitar stasiun sedang menghela nafas lega setelah seharian beraktivitas. Raut para mahasiswa yang bergerombol menanti kereta tampak lelah, pakaian tidak serapi pagi tadi, tidak tercium lagi wangi parfum yang menggelitik hidung, serta muka mereka berminyak.

Sepertinya selang waktu kedatangan kereta yang terakhir telah cukup lama membuat para calon penumpang, sebagian besar mahasiswa UI, padat menunggu di peron yang hampir tidak pernah sepi ini. Ternyata keberuntungan bersama kami, tak berhasil mendapatkan tempat duduk, kereta jurusan Jakarta-Kota pun segera datang.

“Eh, pada mau naik yah?” tanyaku.

“Ya iyalah! Udah sore tau,” jawab Adah.

“O, ya udah deh. Da-dah,” ujarku.

Lho, elo ga pulang terus mau ngapain?!” tanya Adah di saat-saat terakhir karena kereta telah tiba.

“Nungguin Ganjar. Hari ini mau pulang bareng. Katanya abis dari kantor mau ke sini,” jawabku lagi.

“Oke deh, gue duluan ya Tes!” Sambil melambaikan tangan, Adah menghilang ditelan kerumunan penumpang lain yang mendesak berebut masuk. Sedangkan teman-temanku yang lain sudah entah ke mana rimbanya.

Kemudian, aku dapat duduk dengan leluasa di peron, yang tiang-tiangnya bercatkan warna hijau tua yang mulai pudar, bersama penumpang lain yang tidak muat masuk atau kalah berdesakan dengan yang lain. Sedapat mungkin kuusahakan membuat diriku nyaman sambil menunggumu di kursi keras panjang dari besi yang sudah berkarat ini. Terlebih lagi pandanganku agak terganggu oleh sinar matahari menyilaukan yang berada tepat di sebelah depan bagian atasku. Waktu di jamku menunjukkan jam setengah lima sore tapi ternyata matahari masih menyisakan tenaganya setelah belum cukup sejak siang tadi dengan kekuatan penuh memanasiku sampai nyaris matang.

Hari ini kamu janji akan datang jam lima. Seperti biasa, kamu pasti akan datang terlambat. Seperti biasanya pula, aku datang sebelum waktu yang kita janjikan. Pada mulanya kelakuanmu memang menjengkelkan, tetapi lama-kelamaan hatiku memahaminya sebagai bagian dari dirimu yang tak sedikit pun ingin aku ubah.

Sungguh ajaib memang, betapa membayangkan untuk mengakhiri hari ini bersamamu sama menghiburnya seperti memakan tiramisu kesukaanku. Akan tetapi, seringkali saat-saat bersamamu sama halnya seperti mendengarkan lagu cinta di radio. Terasa bahagia ketika lagu yang diputar bercerita tentang indahnya jatuh cinta. Akan terasa sendu ketika tentang percintaan yang kandas. Walaupun keduanya menunjukkan perbedaan, tetapi kedua pertentangan yang disebabkan oleh cinta ini ‘hidup berdampingan’, baik aku suka atau tidak.

Waduh, cinta? Apa sih sebenarnya cinta itu? Berbagai pengertian akan cinta dijabarkan oleh tiap-tiap lagu dengan cara yang berbeda, tidak ada satu pengertian cinta yang solid. Satu hal yang pasti, aku tidak bisa seenaknya saja menentukan lagu mana yang diputar, mana yang tidak, tentu saja karena aku mendengarkan mereka di radio. Semua tergantung dj-nya.

Jarang sekali aku berkesempatan untuk pulang sore dan menghabiskan banyak waktu di peron stasiun ini. Kebanyakan bila pulang kuliah di sore hari, aku dan teman-teman bergegas naik kereta yang pertama tiba, tak sabar ingin segera pulang. Hari ini aku dapat lebih meresapi pemandangan yang ada. Dari tempatku duduk yang kira-kira berada di tengah peron, terlihat beberapa penumpang yang duduk di kursi seberang menunggu kereta tujuan Bogor. Sama halnya dengan sisi yang aku duduki ini, di kanan kiri kursi besi yang mereka duduki terdapat kios kecil yang menjual rokok, minuman, dan makanan ringan. Tidak seperti di pagi hari yang biasanya penumpang tujuan Bogor itu sepi, ternyata di sore hari banyak juga yang ingin menuju ke sana.

Dari sekian banyak penumpang di seberang, selain dua orang bapak-bapak sederhana paruh baya menjinjing alat memancing yang melintas dengan santai, hanya tiga orang yang benar-benar menarik perhatianku. Sinar matahari yang sedari tadi bersinar terik sekarang mulai tidak terlalu menyorot lagi, sehingga aku tidak perlu memicingkan mata untuk memperhatikan mereka. Sosok pertama yang menarik perhatianku adalah seorang pemuda agak montok dengan tinggi rata-rata seorang pria berusia sekitar 25 tahunan.

Ia memakai kemeja lengan pendek berwarna biru tua kotak-kotak dengan celana kain hitam. Menurut perkiraanku ia baru saja pulang kerja, tapi kok ia tidak membawa tas kerja yah? Wah, pikiranku terpengaruh karena melihat kamu yang setiap kerja membawa tas punggung hitam besar berisikan disket, cd, dan berkas-berkas kerja. Hal yang lebih menarik perhatianku adalah cara pemuda itu duduk dengan amat santai. Sepatu sandal hitam yang dikenakannya telah dilepas dan sekarang ia menaikkan kakinya dengan gaya seperti nongkrong di warung kopi. Kontras sekali dengan penampilannya yang rapi. Terlihat juga ia memandang ke arahku, memperhatikan mahasiswi-mahasiswi cantik yang baru saja lewat di depanku. Dasar!

Dua sosok lainnya yang juga menarik perhatianku adalah sepasang kekasih yang sedang asyik mengobrol. Wajah mereka agak mirip dan mereka terlihat cukup serasi. Sang pria berpenampilan lebih sederhana dari kekasihnya. Ia mengenakan kemeja lengan panjang biru muda yang tidak dimasukkan dengan celana kain hitam. Sedangkan, kekasihnya memakai rok serta jaket jeans berwarna biru tua dengan scarf coklat muda yang dililitkan di lehernya. Hm, cukup modis dan aku mengagumi perempuan-perempuan yang mampu tetap menggunakan jaket jeans-nya di hari yang cukup terik ini. Mungkin ia sedang sakit? Atau demi gaya saja? Entahlah, tapi aku pribadi tidak akan mengenakan jaket jeans beserta scarf di hari sepanas ini. Sayang tidak terlihat dari tempatku duduk pakaian dibalik jaketnya.

Haha, lucu sekali, ujarku dalam hati sambil tersenyum simpul. Sang pria tampak memaksa untuk membawakan tas kekasihnya karena kereta arah Bogor segera datang, tetapi sang kekasih menolaknya dan mereka sejenak terlihat sibuk memperebutkan tas berwarna coklat muda tersebut. Kereta arah Bogor pun tiba dan menghalangi pandanganku. Kemudian, mereka pun pergi. Sedangkan kamu, tetap belum juga datang.

Sibuk memperhatikan mereka, tanpa terasa aku telah menantimu selama 30 menit. Wah, sebentar lagi kamu akan datang. Senang rasanya karena kamu bagaikan matahari di tiap mendungku. Bayangkan saja, bahkan ketika aku ngambek, kamu dengan ocehanmu yang ceria tetap berhasil membuat joke-joke yang mau tidak mau membuatku tertawa.

Sungguh dalam waktu setengah jam saja suasana telah berubah. Sinar matahari telah benar-benar meredup bahkan nyaris pudar. Kutengok langit di atas stasiun, terlihat langit sedikit mendung. Mudah-mudahan hujan tidak turun sampai kita tiba di rumahku. Mendung membuat udara di peron yang mulai dipadati lagi dengan penumpang terasa sedikit pengap.

Tiba-tiba aku tersadar, setahuku kamu datang dari stasiun Kalibata, lalu mengapa justru aku menunggumu di peron yang ke arah Jakarta-Kota? Dasar dodol! Dengan sigap aku berdiri dan berjalan untuk pindah ke peron seberang. Setibanya di seberang, terlihat dari ujung peron kereta datang. Semoga saja kereta yang membawamu, Jar. Dengan manis aku duduk dan berusaha merapikan rambut serta bajuku sedapat mungkin.

Kereta pun tiba. Di antara kerumunan penumpang yang baru turun kucoba mencari sosok coklat gelapmu yang kurindukan, tidak terlalu tinggi untuk ukuran seorang pria serta langsing. Ah! Itu dia! Hai Jar! Wajahmu tampak lelah, tetapi tanganmu segera dengan hangat menggandeng. Cinta? Apa sih cinta itu, Jar?

Thursday, December 22, 2005

*My Favorite Poem of the Day* William Blake's

The Clod and The Pebble

"Love seeketh not itself to please,
Nor for itself hath any care,
But for another gives its ease,
And builds a heaven in hell's despair."

So sung a little Clod of Clay,
Trodden with the cattle's feet,
But a Pebble of the brook
Warbled out these metres meet:

"Love seeketh only Self to please,
To bind another to its delight,
Joys in another's loss of ease,
And builds a hell in heaven's despite."

Monday, December 19, 2005


The Good Old Days

Time... looking at pictures sometimes remind me how time flies. This is definitely one of my most favorite pictures coz it reminds me how wonderful life was with Ganjar. Today, I look at the picture and wish time could stop at that day and time, but.... of course it can't. So the best I can do is just be thankful of the good old days and look forward to the next happenings in my life.
Hoping that we both could achieve the best in life and keep the friendship for life.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005





Speaking of the luckiest person,
I think I'm one the the most blessed human being to have been able to experience love and be loved.
I know that one shouldn't feel blessed just when I'm most happy but really, knowing that there are more than one people who love and appreciate me the way I am, that's just overwhelming.
Gosh, in the next few days I'll have to make probably one of the biggest decisions in my life in determining my future.
Wish me luck...

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

* My Favorite Poem of the Day*

bobo yuk, sayang...

hangat,
damai,
dicintai,
dilindungi,
ketika aku dipelukanmu
hangatnya tubuhmu
damainya mendengar jantungmu, jiwamu
berbagi udara yang sama denganmu
hembusan cintamu kudengar walau tak kau katakan
lenganmu yang melindungi,
wajahmu yang t'lah lelap tertidur
aku ngantuk sayang
cintamu seperti hujan,
berjatuhan, terlalu hangat,
aku dan kamu,
bobo yuk, sayang...

to the luckiest guy

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Monday, November 28, 2005

9:05pm about to finish working
thought i'd write a quick note bout my day. Well, had to come back to the office after the MC short course this afternoon to catch up some works before another busy day tomorrow. The boss was not very happy this morning accussing my manager as a lousy leader by leaving his staff (that would be me) with only a little work to do -- yeah right, and look who's working overtime tonite -- Ummm, thats all I got in mind, now, going home.... woohoo, nite-nite all

Monday, November 14, 2005


*My Favorite Song of the Day*

"Just A Ride"

Life, it's ever so strange
It's so full of change
Think that you've worked it out
Then BANG
Right out of the blue
Something happens to you
To throw you off course
And then you

Breakdown
Yeah you breakdown
Well don't you breakdown
Listen to me
Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride
No need to run, no need to hide
It'll take you round and round
Sometimes you're up
Sometimes you're down
It's just a ride, it's just a ride
Don't be scared
Don't hide your eyes
It may feel so real inside
But don't forget it's just a ride

Truth, we don't wanna hear
It's too much to take
Don't like to feel out of control
So we make our plans
Ten times a day
And when they don't go
Our way we

Breakdown
Yeah we breakdown
Well don't you breakdown
Listen to me
Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride
No need to run, no need to hide
It'll take you round and round
Sometimes you're up
Sometimes you're down
It's just a ride, it's just a ride
Don't be scared
Don't hide your eyes
It may feel so real inside
But don't forget it's just a ride

Slowly, oh so very slowly
Except that
There's no getting off
So live it, just gotta go with it
Coz this ride's, never gonna stop

Breakdown
Don't you breakdown
No need to breakdown
No need at all
Because

It's just a ride, it's just a ride
No need to run, no need to hide
It'll take you all around
Sometimes you're up
Sometimes you're down
It's just a ride, it's just a ride
Don't be scared now
Dry your eyes
It may feel so real inside
But don't forget enjoy the ride

~ JEM ~

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Yello....
Wow, I haven't updated this blog for quite a while now.
Anyhow, my to do list :

- focusing on the book launching preparation on December 4 (crossing my fingers) :
> follow up technical with performing schools
> confirming the Ministers & UNICEF Ambassador attendance
> compiling & sending invitations
> making buzz to the press
> and the list goes on....

- transfer some pictures from my last idul fitri holiday in Bandung
- share the stories from the holiday
- and always, enjoy the ride!

Back to work now :)

Tuesday, October 25, 2005


*My Favorite Prayers*

God grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoyig one moment at a time. Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace. Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it. Trusting that you will make all things right if I surrender to Your will. So that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen.

Friday, October 21, 2005


I need a f****ing vacatiooonnn
(this my friend is where I wanna go someday - can anybody guess where this is?)

Have a great weekend, guys!

Wednesday, October 19, 2005


(Not really) Clueless

Had a conversation today with one of my best friends about women being smarter and earning more money than men nowadays. I know, it's the same old boring stuff that not many consider as essential to talk about anymore. But somehow it's still a big issue here in Indonesia.

I told my friend about a guy who considers that his wife should be less beautiful, less smart, earn less money than he is. Come on..! What's that all about I said to my friend. And what do you know he said that it's sadly true. He himself would prefer his future wife to have such features. Man... that's so not cool to think of women as subordinate to male. He argued that women earning more money may have no respects towards their spouses. Duh...! Moreover he said, guys would not want people to think that their are less powerful having that their spouses make better earnings.

That's just the trouble living in such a patriarchal environment. Firstly, I consider the society as the strongest cause. The guys just couldn't bare the thought about what people may think and say if they as the head of the family earned less money (less powerful) then their spouses. Secondly, it's basically just male egos which do not like being at the same level as women. I must say that we have been pampered since kids to this gender way of thinking that girls should play with dolls and boys with trucks; girls are sappy and boys are strong. The mind-set somehow constitute how a woman and a man should feel, view, and act towards the opposite according to the norms made-up by the society.

It is at one side is hard to change our patriarchal way of thinking that has been embedded to this society since many years before, however, things have changed and I think this freaks the guys out and the patriarchal society in general. They are just not used to the fact that women can actually be as smart and as strong in character as male. Even if the guys have been already aware of the fact, Indonesian men just are not ready and strong enough to take a stand opposed the society. Then, what to do?

I say the hell with what people think; it’s your happiness that counts!

Monday, October 17, 2005


Sleepeeeee...

Really, there’s not much to say than I’m so darn sleepy…

*4.15pm @ work* I’ve had a cup of cappuccino but it didn’t do any good. Somebody is playing a country song, what more could I ask? *turn it off!!*

I couldn’t help from being cranky everytime I’m lack of sleep and rest. Had a nice weekend but have not got much time to enjoy myself. Spent Saturday morning at the office to get some things done. After it, went to have a hair masker at the salon at the afternoon. And I had to go back to the office on Sunday morning to get some picture files. Then went straight to attend church activity until 2.30pm. Had my lunch at around 3.30pm. Spent a quiet night at home after it, couldn’t sleep until around 11pm though. Fiuuhh, what a day. Don’t you guys sometimes wish that you could have a longer weekend?

Friday, October 14, 2005


Well, well, what d'ya know...

It's weekend already.
What to do, what to do?
Going to the movies? Is there any good movies this weekend?

Speaking of movies, my favorite movie of all time is definitely Forrest Gump. I've watched the movie for about 5 times now and yet never had enough of it. I really like the part when Forrest lost his wife and he kept running for two years until he felt better. I can totally relate with how human sometimes try to endure their sadness by "running away" or in real life perhaps "keeping ourselves busy." Another favorite is What Dream May Come, hmm... all I can say bout the movie is just fantastic! Great fantasy, very touching love story on a very deep relationship between the husband and wife. Have you watched them?

Now, those are only two of my many favorite movies. Speak more about them later. I’m all set to go. Anybody wanna treat this time? :)

Have a great weekend everyone.
(Btw, who is that girl in the picture? he he, what a narcist)

Thursday, October 13, 2005


Robert Frost's Mending Wall
The Numbness of Human Communication


Communication is very crucial in everyone’s live. One can never state his or her opinion unless one speaks his or her idea to the other. Moreover, by communicating to other people, one shows his or her concern of the surroundings. Just a simple question like, “Hi, how are you?” shows how much one cares about the people around him or her.

What will ever happen if people ceased to care about one another; that one’s problem is one’s business and not the others? What will happen if people neglected what is going on to their surroundings and start to take thing as it is? A great lack of communication between people may occur. People will mind their own businesses and carry on with their lives without the thought of others’ well being.

Robert Frost in one of his famous poems Mending Wall also wants to uphold the theme of individuality; that there has been a lack of communication between people. It happens as a result of people’s ignorance toward one another. The ignorance occurs as an effect of the boundaries that people put between each other, as if one is more dominant than the other. Consequently, a restraining in one’s freedom of thought may arise.

Human’s communication is not always easy. The lack of communication among people happens because there have always been boundaries which is not only been made by oneself but also affected by the society. For instance, there are people who are self-restraint. They are the kind of people who like to keep their privacy in lives. They do communicate to others, however, there is always a notable barrier that they put between themselves and others. As is there are some limitations to where others can explore from the people who are reserved, especially upon their attitudes, ideology, and territories.

Furthermore, the great deficiency of interaction between people might occur also because of the society. The society’s general view upon certain matter often affects people. In another words, the society’s general view influences people’s reaction or frame of mind toward their environment.For example, in the nineteenth century, American society thought of slavery as something logic. The society at that time thinks of people who have black skin as only half-human. Therefore, slaves did not have the right of controlling their own lives. The example shows that there was a gap in communication between the white community with the blacks. The whites always consider themselves as higher than the blacks.

From Robert Frost's Mending Wall, humankind erects and maintains real and symbolic barriers to protect and defend opposing stances, beliefs and territories. The title itself Mending Wall seems to suggest something about the poem. The adjective "Mending" takes the gerund, which means it, is talking about the present. Perhaps this suggest that the task is continuos and always there. Also the fact that it is not called Mending The Wall or Mending A Wall suggests that it is not just one wall, but it can be any wall anywhere. The title gives a very universal meaning.


The two neighbors in this poem seem to be building the wall initially about territory, but if we look deeper into it, it seems to be more about marking boundaries to stop arguments. It is shown in one of the neighbors’ only statement "Good fences make good neighbors." Both neighbors do not share the same ideology about the building of the wall. It seems as though they must repeat this task every springtime, but whereas one neighbor does it through tradition and because he wants to, the other appears to be just going along with it “Oh, just another kind of outdoor game, / One on a side.” he does not seem to understand. As in, “It comes to little more: / There where it is we do not need the wall: / He is all pine and I am apple orchard. / My apple trees will never get across / And eat the cones under his pines, I tell him.” Also in " Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder / If I could put a notion in his head: / Why do they make good neighbors? Isn’t it / Where there are cows? But here there are no cows."


The little communication between the two men appears in that the neighbor only seems to say one thing: "Good fences make good neighbors." The neighbor repeats this saying although he does not know whether the wall is necessary nor does he know whether it will make them a better neighbor. The same thing happens to people who make boundaries in their relationship with others. The only reason that people put up certain limitations in communicating with others is only because of tradition. Such as in the lines “He will not go behind his father's saying, / And he likes having thought of it so well / He says again, 'Good fences make good neighbors.' ”

What makes the fence building seem quite traditional is the reference the old things. The use of "old-stone savage armed" gives the idea of time passed, and yet still carrying on. The line where it mentions "his father's saying" suggests it is something that has been done for generations, and it is tradition. If people do something only in order to keep a tradition and not even bother why it has been that way, it may lead them to ignorance.

The neighbor's father did in the poem, reinforced and insured a lack of communication and, therefore, ignorance in the next generation. The neighbor is a perfect example of the product of these barriers, he does not truly know why the wall must be there but he never questions his father's words and understands that the wall is really keeping him and his neighbor from having a better friendship. The lines describe the neighbor "like an old-stone savage armed. / He moves in darkness as it seems to me." This darkness is the ignorance that people display as they mend the “fence” between themselves with the others.

The lack of mutual communication between people makes one being quite dominant over the other. As in the poem, the gap in balance communication among the two neighbors causes one neighbor to be more authoritative over the other. The line "I let my neighbor know beyond a hill;" shows how one feels reluctant to tell his thought toward someone who already set up some “walls”. The way he lets his neighbor know shows that he wants to do the right thing by informing him, yet if he does not really agree with the building of the wall, he would not bother to inform him.

Another thing that suggests the agreement in the poem is the way "beyond a hill" is used. It suggests boundaries and being far apart from one another; they do not seem to have good communications. There is also another reference to the boundary idea is where it says, "We keep the wall between us as we go." It seems to suggest that they are working together, but trying to keep each other apart as they do so, and so creating a boundary.

The reinforcement of ignorance should be stopped. In order to have a mutual communication; one should have the courage to break down the barriers set up by humankind. These barriers are what keep people from questioning or even contemplating things that happen in every day life. These barriers are often subconsciously put up and strengthened by society and may control one's thought. These techniques may be used by governments and other institutions to insure that someone does not know "too much" or uncover certain conspiracies. Further control of one’s thought should be prevented and people must help themselves so that human can eventually attain freedom of thought.

Robert Frost’s Mending Wall represents what is also happening in human communication. Whether people realize it or not, the barrier being put up causes individuality. It is also restraining others freedom of thought, a process that has gone on and become reinforced over a long period of time. Boundaries between human communication should not really be there, despite the fact that they exist all around. Things should be free, rather than fenced in by walls, physical or otherwise.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005


I Dream of Genie, naah…

I wish I had dreamed of genie instead of the bad dream I had last night. I was in a kind of dam and I could adjust the fast flowing water at will. It was an unpleasant dream because whenever I changed the water flow, say I made a wave, the water come back and showered me. Such an exhausting dream… and I really wish I’d dreamed of genie instead, who knows she could fulfill my wishes in having blissful dreams always (just kidding)

Do you believe that sometimes dreams can represent you innermost will, passion, or fear? I heard that a dream about big amount of water could represent a person’s anxiety (well, perhaps I subconsciously am feeling worried about something) Well, what do you think all you dream interpreters out there?

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


Romeo, oh Romeo...
where art thou?

11am @ the office -- yawning away... still feeling sleepy (lazy girl... smiling) trying to focus my mind on work but in a dreamy state of mind (I wonder how that works)

Anyway, I watched the Desperate Housewives last nite and at the end of the episode -- I forgot the name of the wife that shot herself and become the narrator -- she said that everybody is looking for love, some who had found it, wish they hadn't. Well, that's interesting because I think there are always paradoxes in life. I mean, I feel very blessed that I'm given the chance to experience love and to be loved, just sometimes things are not as easy as they seem. Oh, that's just the beauty of life... don't you just love life? -- ok, back to work now --


Butterfly, What?

Some people may have different opinions or feelings towards butterflies and what they represent. Just as Morisot's Butterfly Hunt, some may think of them as nice, but some even have phobia of butterflies. Do share about anything you'd like to say about butterfly, especially on what do you think it represents....