Wednesday, October 19, 2005


(Not really) Clueless

Had a conversation today with one of my best friends about women being smarter and earning more money than men nowadays. I know, it's the same old boring stuff that not many consider as essential to talk about anymore. But somehow it's still a big issue here in Indonesia.

I told my friend about a guy who considers that his wife should be less beautiful, less smart, earn less money than he is. Come on..! What's that all about I said to my friend. And what do you know he said that it's sadly true. He himself would prefer his future wife to have such features. Man... that's so not cool to think of women as subordinate to male. He argued that women earning more money may have no respects towards their spouses. Duh...! Moreover he said, guys would not want people to think that their are less powerful having that their spouses make better earnings.

That's just the trouble living in such a patriarchal environment. Firstly, I consider the society as the strongest cause. The guys just couldn't bare the thought about what people may think and say if they as the head of the family earned less money (less powerful) then their spouses. Secondly, it's basically just male egos which do not like being at the same level as women. I must say that we have been pampered since kids to this gender way of thinking that girls should play with dolls and boys with trucks; girls are sappy and boys are strong. The mind-set somehow constitute how a woman and a man should feel, view, and act towards the opposite according to the norms made-up by the society.

It is at one side is hard to change our patriarchal way of thinking that has been embedded to this society since many years before, however, things have changed and I think this freaks the guys out and the patriarchal society in general. They are just not used to the fact that women can actually be as smart and as strong in character as male. Even if the guys have been already aware of the fact, Indonesian men just are not ready and strong enough to take a stand opposed the society. Then, what to do?

I say the hell with what people think; it’s your happiness that counts!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Yes, you're right, the hell with the people. Our happines is not their concern.